The Expedition

We assembled in the usual room at the usual time, a couple of dozen in number and counting the minutes before we’d begin the march.  Called to attention, the excited voices quieted for roll call.  Barely seated and itching to leave, we waited for the tally to be completed so we could gear up and go.  A name was called, quickly answered by a raised hand and a “here!” The process repeated again and again, each name followed by an affirmative answer.  Of course everyone made it in that day, who’d miss the chance for adventure?

With all souls accounted for and our safety briefing done, we gathered our kit. Three sheets of large paper rolled up for transport.  Check.  Crayons of various colors.  Check.  Peanut butter and jelly sandwich in brown paper bag.  Check. Permission slip.  Check.

Released from our seats, we assumed classic school formation: the single file line.  And there we stood, like a plane full of paratroops waiting for the green light to signal the jump through the door.  Excitement, anticipation, and the general happiness that is leaving school early caused little feet to creep slowly forward as we awaited the signal to go.  Unlike most field trips, we’d take no bus.  This time, and only this time, we would walk.

There’s  a relationship between distance and the length of the leg.  The legs were all short that day, so our destination felt farther away than it actually was.  In reality the school sat in the center of a large subdivision, and our objective waited on the other side of the road that defined its southern most border.  To get to that road, and to what now would be a death-defying dash across it, was only as scenic as your enjoyment of deja-vu.

Having left the school grounds, our line of intrepid young adventurers headed into the collection of houses and streets.  We walked single file, shadowing the curb, and passed house after similarly looking house until it felt like the background of an old cartoon that repeats itself every few frames.  The teacher worked the line like a sheep dog, keeping us herded and moving in the proper direction.  The fact that one car could take us all out like a row of dominoes must not have been a concern back then.

Our march ended with us (illegally) crossing the road the subdivision emptied out on to, and entering the old cemetery.  Yes, a cemetery.

Every cemetery I’ve ever seen looks a whole lot like every other.  Green grass, old-growth trees, stones of various natures, statuary that you’d swear moves when it’s in the corner of your eye, and the uncertainty of where it’s safe to walk.  If stepping on a crack is dangerous, treading over the wrong part of a graveyard can’t be good – on account of that other thing that all cemeteries have in common.

What was unique that day, obviously, was the two-dozen kids running around with paper and crayons, carefully taking rubbings of hundred-year old headstones.  What lesson plan the activity was linked to is lost to my memory, but we took our rubbings, ate our lunches, and walked back to the school the same way we came.

How the teacher justified an excursion to a graveyard is beyond me.  How the entity that manages the cemetery allowed it is even more mind-boggling.  But we did it then, and I wish I still had those rubbings as a souvenir of a memorable day, and my first encounter with morbid curiosity.  After all, any kid worth his salt is going to start wondering about the state of what’s buried underneath that stone.

The era of exploration may be over – the maps of the old gentleman adventurer now hang covered in pins indicating “been there, done that”.   No longer are wooden sailing ships filled with provisions and pushed into the depths of the Antarctic. Flags have been planted on both the North and South Poles, even the moon.  The highest of mountains have been conquered, the deepest of caves explored.  Not that man has stuck his finger in every nook and cranny of this planet, but it’s safe to say that if human feet haven’t touched it, the eyes of the satellites have.  But, one of the greatest things about being a kid is none of that crap matters, and even a day long hike can be a grand expedition.

Going Back In 4/4 Time

It’s been said that smell can trigger memories better than anything else. I’m sure that can be linked to the animal portion of our brains – some survival mechanism whose main purpose is forgotten, long ago replaced by logic and reason. While that may be true, I find it takes a far back seat to music for really dredging up the past.

There’s a CD case that stands against the wall in the other room, one of those glue, sawdust and wood-grain sticker deals, pretty much untouched since it was moved there years ago.  It’s an artifact of a bygone age, and I can’t tell you the last time I slid a disc out for a listen. The truth is I’m a bit afraid to. The thing is a mausoleum, each dusty compartment holding a little bit of my past encapsulated with its musical accompaniment.  Stacked one atop the other, with just a fraction of an inch worth of space between them, lay the polycarbonate corpses of my lost decade. There are a few happy times in the stack along the left side. Lots of loss on the top right, just above the melancholy. Then there is ‘her’ section. We’ll leave her out of this. The point is, the music was always playing back then, and to listen to it now doesn’t come without a price. It’s amazing what the brain can throw back at you with the proper stimulus, and how an old memory can still make you feel a bit of unease years after its interment.

Well, certainly memory is a curious machine and strangely capricious. It has no order, it has no system, it has no notion of values, it is always throwing away gold and hoarding rubbish. -Mark Twain

Anyway, I’m cautious touching the thing for all it might rattle loose. Remember what happened when they cracked the lid on the Ark?  Not that all the memories entombed there are bad, but truth be told, the bad tend to be more sticky. At least during that era. I’m not sure why I haven’t gotten rid of the damn thing.

That’s the odd thing about nostalgia, and revisiting the past whether by choice or errant thought. It’s the part people may forget. By its very meaning, there’s some pain involved.  In fact, for a time it was considered a disease; one serious enough to lead to death (allegedly), usually afflicting soldiers unable to go home.  But I ask you friend, are we all not soldiers at war with our pasts at one time or another?

Back to the front.